Craigslist bait… Selling a golf club to some guy.

I realize that posting is super small… it says:

“i’m sellin my old Nike driver.  this thing is the complete bombastic.  its the same one that Tiger Woods uses

i literally destroy balls when i hit them with this thing.  if you want it you got to be able to bring it and you got to be able prove it to me.  i dont want no sissy using this golf club.  be a real man or don’t waste my time

hit me up yo”

They are in RED and I am in GREEN.

On Feb 1, 2012, at 9:41 AM, wrote:
I am interested in the driver you have listed on Craigslist.  Is it still available?
On Wed, Feb 1, 2012 at 9:55 AM, wrote:
right.  you know it is.  you any good at golf?
On Feb 1, 2012, at 10:01 AM, wrote:
Great.  I live in Barrington but work downtown on Wacker.  How about I meet you in Wicker Park to take a look at the club.  Is it the 380cc or the 460cc?
On Wed, Feb 1, 2012 at 10:04 AM, wrote:
cc?  man this is a nike golf club yo.  how good are you at golfing.   i only want a real man to have this club.  she completely crushes balls
On Feb 1, 2012, at 10:08 AM, wrote:
It should say on the club face what cc it is.  There is a difference in the clubs and thus the clubs value.  Are you free to meet tomorrow or Friday? I’d like the club.
On Wed, Feb 1, 2012 at 10:12 AM, wrote:
right.  i dont see any cc on the face right.  it just says like quack heel.  i need to be sure you gonna keep on smashing balls w this club.  i cant have no pussy using it.  this is the same club that tiger woods uses so you got to be able to bring it.
On Feb 1, 2012, at 10:22 AM, wrote:
I am leaving for a trip to Scotland on Sunday and would like to purchase the club before then.  Does it say QuadFeel?
On Wed, Feb 1, 2012 at 10:35 AM, wrote:
thats right.  i said that.  quack feel yo.  i got to know you can crush it alright.  how long you hit em off the tee?  who’s this scott guy?
On Feb 1, 2012, at 10:41 AM, wrote:
Can I just come see the club please?  Are you still asking $50?
On Wed, Feb 1, 2012 at 10:48 AM, wrote:
thats what the listing says.  listen brotha.  i need to be sure you can hit this bitch.  you have to tell me how far youre gonna hit it or i cant give it to you.  i usually average like 400-500 yards a drive
On Feb 1, 2012, at 11:12 AM, wrote:
500 yards? Thats quite a shot.  Quite the discrepancy between 400 and 500.  I would like to meet you to take a look at the club.  Have you found if it is 380 or 460?  Can we arrange a time and place to meet?
On Wed, Feb 1, 2012 at 11:14 AM, wrote:
theres no cc on this club man.  quit asking.  380 i hope you hit it that far.  500 isnt that far for me.  i punish these balls.  yeah man we can meet once you tell me what kind of golfer you are.
On Feb 1, 2012, at 11:18 AM, wrote:
Ok “brotha.”  If you must know, I am a 2.  I don’t know why that matters.  I want the club.  Must we continue with this?  How about we meet at Filter.  It is a coffee shop on Milwaukee Avenue.  if you live in WP then you know where it is.
On Wed, Feb 1, 2012 at 11:27 AM, wrote:
youre 2?  thats kinda young to golf.  i think we need to meet at the range so i can see you hitting the balls yo
On Feb 1, 2012, at 11:30 AM, wrote:
Meet at the range to see me hit the balls?  Why does that matter?  Let’s meet at Filter tomorrow at 6pm.  Thank you.  I will bring $50 cash.
On Wed, Feb 1, 2012 at 11:37 AM, wrote:
i dont think youre following me brohan.  i need to see you hit this club.  bitch is used to walloping on balls and i cant have some 2 year old buying her.  youve got to be able to pound shit and at your age you cant.  alright.  so sorry man.  no deal.  let me know when you start driving hard ok.  peace little man.  say hello to scott for me
On Feb 1, 2012, at 11:40 AM, wrote:
I’m not 2 years old?  I’m a 2 handicap.  Are you joking?  Do you actually have the club?  Again, how does Filter work for you tomorrow at 6pm?
On Wed, Feb 1, 2012 at 11:44 AM, wrote:
yo bro.  i dont think you know how golf works.  i need to know if you crush balls.  a handicap cant play golf either.  how far do you pound em?
On Feb 1, 2012, at 11:46 AM, wrote:
This is a joke right?
On Wed, Feb 1, 2012 at 11:50 AM, wrote:
man theres nothin funny about this.  when you see me at the diversey range tomorrow youll know im not joking with you.
On Feb 1, 2012, at 12:02 PM, wrote:
I never agreed to meet you at the range.  I said Filter on Milwaukee in Wicker Park.  See you at 6.
On Wed, Feb 1, 2012 at 12:12 PM, wrote:
i can tell you a bitch from the way youre not telling me how far you can hit it.  i should have known this is what i would get from some sissy in the suburbs.  typical golf poser.  have fun at your friend scotts

I then didn’t hear back from him…

On Fri, Feb 3, 2012 at 8:50 AM, wrote:
what happend to you?  i knew you wouldnt be there last night.  did you see me dominating drives and got scared?  i was the one with the black ed hardy shirt on.  you probably saw all the ho’s checking me out.  i knew you would back out.  your friend scott want the club?
On Feb 3, 2012, at 11:45 AM, wrote:
I never agreed to meet you.  Please stop contacting me.
On Wed, Feb 3, 2012 at 12:18 PM, wrote:
typical suburban mom.  have fun with your buddy scott.  does your husband know you play golf alice?
On Feb 3, 2012, at 12:26 PM, wrote:
I have no idea what you are talking about?  Please stop emailing me.  I’m sorry I ever contacted you at all.  If you wanted to sell the club you could have.

I wait a few days hoping he is back from Scotland.

On Wed, Feb 8, 2012 at 10:42 AM, wrote:
you done playing around with scott?  come buy the club like you promised me.
On Feb 8, 2012, at 4:17 PM, wrote:
Why are you still contacting me?  I already purchased another club and have returned from “Scotts.”  What is your deal?
On Wed, Feb 8, 2012 at 5:03 PM, wrote:
you might recognize me from the range the other day.  i know you was there

On Feb 8, 2012, at 8:25 PM, wrote:
Hahahaha.  That’s the Jersey Shore guy.  I can’t believe you have this much time on your hands.

I got some amazing ideas from everyone for ideas to post on Craigslist.  Thank you and KEEP THEM COMING!

I’m still e-mailing the lady that is going to come “Exercise my demons.”  Hopefully get that online soon but I can’t possibly shake her prematurely.

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