MY NAME IS CHIP. WEIRD SHIT JUST SORTA HAPPENS TO ME. THIS IS A SOME OF THAT SHIT.
In 2007, I went to Ann Arbor with Smells to watch Michigan destroy Notre Dame. I love Notre Dame football and have always wanted to go to the Big House, Michigan’s Stadium. We got there on Friday night and did the usual campus drinking. We woke up Saturday morning, tailgated and headed into the stadium. When we got to our seats, I started feeling that “Uh oh” grumble down below.
I went to the Black Angels concert at The Metro last night with this chick Duck Face that I work with. The background is that on my 3rd day here she got a new puppy and wanted to show me pictures of it. She gave me her iPhone and “accidentally” showed me a full frontal picture of herself. Of course I asked her out ON THE SPOT.
A few months ago I started posting stuff on Craigslist to get rid of some old junk. Well the people who were responding were free unintentional comedy, so i thought I would throw some bait on there and see what I could get.
Went to Louisville for KY Gentleman’s birthday. His wifey threw him a party in the back of this Mexican joint. We were all just sipping margaritas and all of a sudden this guy in a Luchador costume runs in. Not sure what was going on but that guy had a tight ass and a fantastic package if you ask me. I’m not positive but he might have been a stripper because that old lady was grinding all over him.
Our senior year at Dayton we lived near the prime parking area for commuter students, right near the academic buildings. I’d park my Wrangler right in front of our house and leave it there for weeks. (Except of course to drive to the bar every night.) We pretty much had a reserved house parking spot, right in front of our place.
Last fall I took a trip the Finland, Estonia, Latvia, Lithuania and Poland with Charlie Hustle, Bobby Ford and Felix Ackman. Here are a few pictures from our trip.
When I first moved to Chicago I lived in the Lakeview neighborhood near the Church of Scientology of Chicago. I’d walk past it daily and was always intrigued. Thinking “What the hell is going on in that place,” but I never got the gumption to just say screw it and go in. One day I was discussing with Fancy how I wanted to go and she instantly took the bait to join me. We planned our night; dinner, a quick stop into the Scientology Center and then to Schubas to see our friend Nathan Xander’s concert. Game on…
Dear Metra Rail,
I am on a strict schedule. I have a routine. I wake up, shower and then chug an enormous coffee from Dunkin Donuts. I then get on your 2107 train to Fox Lake at exactly 7:49 a.m. For the past 7 years, you arrive at the Western Avenue stop every Monday – Friday at exactly 7:49, exactly. I like to sit in the same seat every morning and I will read the Tribune and kibbutz with the regular riders. Once I’m done with the paper I’ll either rest my eyes or do the Sudoku, I’m cool like that.
May 10, 2012
Chip
chipwrecks 