With art, saying too much can ruin the beauty of what you are experiencing.  You must see the art first, then after you’ve taken in a masterpiece, you form your own interpretation of what you’ve just seen.

The attached piece of literature is one of these rare works of genius.  Please read the attached document first and only then move to the comments below for an explanation.  Without further ado, I present:

“Trifles” – English 151 Drama Paper by Brian Murphy

I’M BEGGING YOU DON”T READ MORE UNTIL YOU’VE READ THE PAPER!  YOU’RE ONLY DOING YOURSELF A DISSERVICE.  TRUST ME.

Trying to explain what you just read is impossible.  How can I explain to you the beauty of a sunset? How do I explain to you the comfort of your mother’s smile?  How can I explain to you the joy you felt at the birth of your first child?  How do I explain to you the piece of art you have just read?  It can not be done.

The simple background is that one of Smell’s college roommates asked if someone would write a paper for him for $50.  Smells obliged and spent his Sunday evening crafting the attached paper.

While I know that every single sentence in this piece is classic material, here are a few special highlights:

1. “Apparently a lot of people want to feel the rush a murderer feels.” – Do they?  Keep me away from these people.
2. “One of the most common belief towards women during the 1910’s was that they were there for mainly cleaning.” – They should probably just chain them to a kitchen sink.  No generalization here.
3. “Then it was the women’s ‘jobs’ to see that the house is tidy, and cute.” – Cute?
4. “Ironic.” – Boom!  One word, full sentence. Learn.
5. “Another thing that women used to be good for was a childbearer and stay home with them while the man was at work.”  – I think they are still good for this childbearer role.
6. “In those bible beating 10’s.” – The 10’s?  We’re they beating Bibles?
7. “She could not handle the choir of daily life.” – Was being in the choir a chore for her?
8. “The bird was her only child.” – How is this physically possible?
9. “All Mrs. Wright did all day was what all women did all day back then with no children, knit.” – That’s all ho’s are doing these days too.  Spending all my money on yarn and making quilts all dam day.
10. “The biggest misconception of women in the past is that they were dumb.” – This is not a misconception.
11. “Men never used to take women seriously.” – How could they?  All they knew how to do was knit.
12. “The coolest thing about this play” – This is the bestest sentence.
13. “This lady Glaspell had the right idea.” – This guy Smells is one hell of a writer.
14. “It sometimes baffles me that women used to believe this garbage we used to tell them back then.” – I think the English language might baffle you as well.
15. “I commend women for their accomplishments” – After reading this, I’m sure many women will sleep better tonight knowing they have the backing of Smells.

I can picture poor Mrs. Farrelly going over this gem.  “Eek’s” “Good Grief” and “Say’s Who” flying from her green pen.  Note that she had to add an extra sheet of paper at the end to put down all of her thoughts.  To summarize, her rantings are basically “Good God, I cannot believe you are a senior at this school.”

Yet after all was said and done, this paper actually received a D-.  YES!  A passing grade at UD.  Smell’s roommate paid him $50 for D- work and probably felt ripped off at the time,  however, we should all be grateful for his investment.  That $50 he spent has brought the world such depth, insight and what is truly one of the written masterpieces of our time.

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