MY NAME IS CHIP. WEIRD SHIT JUST SORTA HAPPENS TO ME. THIS IS A SOME OF THAT SHIT.
This lady was selling a box of K’Nex for $12 on Craigslist. To be honest I had no idea what K’Nex were when I e-mailed her the first time. They are a kids toy that is kinda like Lincoln Logs. So, like Barry Sanders, I saw an opening and I took it.
Every year for the first Friday of the NCAA Basketball tourney, me and all my scumbag friends will get together and watch the games. We skip work and get to the bar around 10am. Then we pretty much act all day like we are in still in college.
The day starts with an all-you-can-drink open bar and after 10 plus hours of drinking, it always ends exactly the way you think it does. We therefore refer to this Friday as “Black Friday.” This year Charlie decided to make the trip to Chicago for the annual debacle.
I wanted to start 2012 off BIG and no one I know is bigger than the KY Gentleman… if you know what I mean. He’s pretty sly for a white guy but you don’t get the nickname KY just because you’re from Kentucky. You get the nickname KY when KY is required. (In some circles he is also known as the Coke can.)
I have since changed my tune on Radiohead but in 2008 I wasn’t a believer in their hype. I thought they were playing crap music and trying to pass it off as art. Smells insisted I was insane and told me I had to check them out at Lollapalooza. Fine, what’s the worst that can happen?.
Academy Award winner Nicolas Cage, a true master of the arts. Thank Zeus’s BUTTHOLE that he beat Sean Penn for Dead Man Walking to win his Academy Award. That would have been more disgusting than the classic Shakespeare in Love beating that piece of shit arthouse flick Saving Private Ryan.
When this dude is in a movie I don’t walk to see him, I light myself on fire and run like a wild maniac to see him. Guy can eat a peach for hours.
Spring break junior year of college we decided to go to my parents lake house in Texas. A pretty ridiculous crew of ten guys, including me, Hustle, Felix, Desire, KY and The Donger hopped in our cars and drove from Dayton to Lake Conroe, outside Houston.
April 8, 2012
Chip
chipwrecks 